So over this weekend Shannon and I talked about where we were gonna put her things. And everytime we talked about it I'm get this initial reaction of not wanting to change (I've never been one to desire change to much) the way things are. I've got my house the way I want. But then again, it's not that bad. Maybe putting my HomeStar Runner things with my other little toys upstairs, maybe moving pictures from the living room to the dining room, that sort of thing. It does force me to do things that I should've done a long time ago (clean out my closets) cause I'll be giving up half my closet space (yeah I use all four closets upstairs). She likes things a bit tidier then I do, not that I'm a slob by any means of the word, so I cleaned up my coaster collection and put most of them away. Now there is only a stack of around 10 or so of relatively uniform size and shape. This made her very happy. So there are just things that I have compromise on.
There still are things that she jokes about that she wants to add to the place (yesterday she joked about adding a garden gnome) and that's one of the reason why she is making this easier. Cause she jokes about it. It makes other things that are a little tougher to take, easier.
So my Dad's email about the whole moving in thing was very well written, and it really comes down to a few things. He thinks that building a long term relationship is based more on trust and commitment to each other and there are certainly a few things in the text that I agree with. Certainly my parent's loving relationship is what I do base most of my thoughts about marriage on. They've been married for thrity some odd years and still are very happy together. Shannon and I have talked about engagement, marriage, who we would invite, where it would be...at least all in theory now. There are no plans to hop along to the next whim that passes by. We are commited to each other. We both make efforts to make things work better for each other (example of snoring, organizing things, making space for her, her watching my salt intake, etc).
As it stands right now, I'll either go over to her house or she'll come over to mine every weekday evening and she'll usually spend the weekend at my place. So the biggest change will be that she'll be sleeping over 5-6 more times a week and won't have to lug her laundry to and from my place once a week. Financially it'll be better for the both of us, her contribution will be significantly less then what it costs her to live where she is at now, and it will also allow me to have more capital free on a month to month basis and also pay more to my financial obligations (house, school loans, car, although most of the extra money will go to 2nd mortgage). We like spending time together, and we've talked about the need for personal space from time to time (getting lost in a book, etc). I know most of these are purely practical reasons, but I don't like to say good bye to her at night either. Finding just the sillyest littlest excuse just to stay 5 minutes longer (Oh no! the door's locked! I guess I can't go. Rats!).
Am I trying to justify it to those who don't necessarily like the route that my life may have taken...well...maybe, but not entirely. I still think that my life is still basically on the path of good (if there is such a thing). I try to be honest with my friends and family and others (although I know I just avoid certain subjects with family cause they can be touchy). I do good things, from taking this guy that was limping down the road to the Mercy Clinic to talk to his wife, to donating my time, efforts, money and/or links to causes that I believe in (Youth Incentives, Des moines Music Coalition, EFF, etc).